Preface
This is a story about God, affirmation, patience, sacrifice, desire, and anxiety. Late last year we finally answered the call from God to move a different direction. He required me to give it all up, to stop leading, to stop thinking, to resign, or at least resign in my heart, so that I could hear Him or at least not be so busy that as I took a few steps down my life's path, I would have the eyes to see the doors He has prepared for me along the way. I thought that it has been a three year preparation of me, but the more I reflect, I am learning more and more that it has been a lifelong preparation. Check out what the word of God says in Ephesians 2:10 and you might hear some of the same things I'm hearing. Nonetheless, the crossroad, the new beginning, the fresh start, the clean slate, not just a new chapter, but a new book in mine and my families life is about to be written.... and I honestly have no idea what its going to say.
Context
It began in August 2010 when I prematurely was confronted by my father and Senior Pastor to fill in as a supply pastor this next summer as he took a very much needed sabbatical. I say prematurely because although Amy and I had been relentlessly discussing our future for months, we had never really decided or knew when the right time to act would be. I suppose this was the kick in the butt that we needed to start the spiral of events in my life. The answer to supply for father was no. "Why?" Because I'm resigning as youth pastor. "Why?" Because that is what God is requiring of me. "Why for what?" I don't know, but its coming soon. "What do you think He wants you to do?" Maybe go into ministry, maybe further my education, maybe be a missionary... I don't know. It was comforting not having the right answers, because somewhere deep inside we know that when its doesn't really make much sense to the world, that God is behind it all. We took refuge in that.
My father went away for the next couple weeks on vacation and I was asked to preach that Sunday. It gave me the opportunity to tell the congregation and youth about my resignation and the foundation that God has built in my ministry at Cambrian park so that I could continue in faith down this foggy path of uncertainty. The response ranged from angry and confused to happy and anxious. We dealt with the rumors as they came, and work with the volunteers to take over in the places of leadership in the church that I was vacating. We were at peace. We were released. Church was no longer a chore. We were no longer captive to Sundays, Monday Nights, Wednesday nights, and every other night the church doors were opened. Ahhhh, breathe... fresh air.
The next step in obedience to God. I need to resign from football and basketball. Gill is a good close friend, so I told earlier in the year that this basketball season would very likely be my last. My relationship that I have with him made that resignation simple. I casually and candidly told him of my resignation and my potential future and he says, "no problem, Coach Scharrenberg told me he would be interested in coaching his son... ( who will soon to be a seventh grader this next year) ... if the position were to open up." Thanks God, that was easy.
Now for football. I have been with the program for 9 years. Head coach for 3. My resignation, which in my mind is coming out of nowhere isn't going to make sense to Coach Machado. Anyhow, before I have a chance to make an appointment with him, with an official resignation letter, he calls me into his office and tells me that he is moving in a different direction and he no longer needs my service as a head coach. Wow, much to my surprise... I thought I did well this last season recovering the end of the season with 5 straight wins in the WCAL.. but he said was going to move me around... he didn't know where, or what role I would take on, but it sure made it easy for me to tell him that I was not going to be back next year. It gave me comfort to know that God was paving the way for me and affirming my thoughts about giving it all up. Thanks God, that was easy. Now all I have to do is resign from teaching and let God lead me to my next endeavor.
Two Paths
For almost a year I was praying and asking God to make it clear. To practically throw me through the open door that he had designed for me. I asked him to prepare my wife and for double the affirmation. I was greedy. I guess I was not all that faithful. If He has to hit me beside the head with a 2 by 4 to get my attention, thats not a clear reflection of strong faith. Back to August, my wife and I were in one of those discussion asking what I would still do if God had prepared us to live San Jose, but move jobs. We both agreed that if the Vice Principal position at the Elementary School were to open up that I could spend the rest of my days at Valley working closely with Gabe and be comfortable in that setting in leadership. So it was on was of those early morning basketball days that Gabe and I were down in the locker room together getting ready for another normal work day when I explained to him that if the VP position were to open up, I would be interested in working with him and applying for that position. Gabe was nice about it, but his current assistant Connie was very good and held the school together. At that time it looked to him as if Connie would be there for a very long time... I suppose God has different plans for me.
In January, I receive a text from Jason, it reads... "Connie is resigning and is moving to Colorado, it would be sweet if you took her job!" Is this the 2 by 4 I was waiting for? I immediately talked to Gabe about the opening and filled out the 15 page application, I wrote my letters and statements, and began preparing for the interview process and began to think deeply about the move into administration at an elementary school.
Meanwhile, Olivet keeps coming up in my mind. I visited the campus this last summer, the football program is in transition and they are looking for a head coach, they have a doctoral program that is very interesting... what is it about Olivet that keeps getting my attention. I continue to research the doctoral program. It is an Ed.D in Ethical Leadership. Many professors from my previous days are involved in the program and it seems to be exactly what I need to move into the next stage of my life. I had talked with Amy about it numerous time, and it wouldn't hurt to apply and check it out. So I do just that. I put some of my eggs in the "Vice Principal position" basket and I put some eggs in the "Doctoral Program" basket. Not knowing which one is for me, I decide to look into both. God will be faithful and he will lead and affirm the right path.
I go to Olivet, spend a couple days with Nick and Brian, I catch up with some old professors and interview for the doctoral program. The interview went great. It seems right. It seems like a great place to raise a family.. and the more I think about the VP and working for Valley, I do not feel that same great peace. Is this God's way of telling me that Midwest and the doctoral program at Olivet is what he has been preparing me for?
That next week Gabe calls... he says, "Lance, there are some parts of my job that I don't like and that are not very easy..." I say, Gabe, before you say anything, let me make this easy for you. I am withdrawing my name from the Vice Principal position.
My mind is going crazy at this point. Why did God put me in that position. Why did I go through all that work and desire that position in the first place to only turn around and turn it down. Why... I don't get it? Is this God's way of affirming the Midwest? Is this God's way of showing me that my best case scenario in San Jose is not the right fit? God must have a different plan and this is His crooked was of affirming that He has prepared me and my family for a new life and lifestyle, new ideals, in the snowy, and windy midwest. I get a letter in the mail. I have been accepted into the doctoral program at Olivet the first class will start in May. My wife walks in the living room one day and casually says... "If we were to move to the Midwest, I am at peace with it." "It will be hard without my family, my support of my friends, but I am at peace with it" I also receive a call from my good friend Brian, him and his wife are thinking about moving. Its possible that in the next year he moves farther south closer to Olivet... interesting. Okay God, it becoming pretty clear to me that this is Your direction for me, what's next?
Pregnant
Meanwhile, as the paths for our lives seem to be going in circles, my wife and I are going to have a little girl! She is due in August! Great timing huh God! Just when you thought our lives could not become more difficult with a change of a career path, a new school, moving to a different state, in a new town, with a new church, new insurance (hopefully), with no family and few contacts, the level of females in my family is going to double... yeaaaah!!! I know that there is quite a bit a sarcasm in the last couple sentences, but I am very happy and I am very proud of my little girl. God was nice... he could of given us twins!
The Phone Call
Very rarely in a persons life does an employer contact a potential employee and ask them to apply for a position that that person is not even aware that it exist. One evening right after dinner, I received a phone call from Dr. Upchurch. Dr. Upchurch is the Dean of the School of Education at Olivet. He was sitting in on my interview for the doctoral program. At some point in my interview he connected with my story and where I was at. Perhaps God had something to do with this. Anyway, the teaching position to teach EDUC 295 Instructional Technology will be opening this next school year and he would like me to consider applying for that position. Wow, was this the 2 by 4 I was asking. In the very same month that I was looking for a job, in Illinois, in education, this position not only opens up, but the guy in charge is asking me if I will apply for the position. Oh, and the man that I will be taking over for, was once my boss when I was a student at ONU. Oh, and if I am chosen they will pay for my moving expenses... Oh also, if I am chosen they will pay for me to receive my doctoral degree. Lastly, the teaching position is the same information that I received my Masters Degree in. But, that is all probably just a coincidence...
Over the next couple weeks I had a couple phone interviews with Upchurch and then set up a trip back to Illinois for the formal interview, to teach a college class, and to meet with the other professors in the School of Education. Its not a sure deal, there were many applicants for the position. Many of them already have the doctorate degrees and many of them have college teaching experience. Doctor Upchurch tells me that they picked three applicants to go through the same process. To make a long story about my three days meeting people, interviewing and walking around Olivet, short, I nailed it! The time I spent with each person seemed to be very valuable. It seems as if I am a perfect fit for this position and that I would have a lot to offer to the school of Ed. Currently I am in a holding pattern waiting to hear back to see if this is what God has prepared me for?
The Great What If!
Surprisingly, the people who have been following our story have very rarely asked the great what if question... Obviously, we are hoping that this position at Olivet is the right fit for me and for the University. But, what if I am not hired to teach at Olivet. What if it doesn't work out the way it should. Then, what are we going to do? I won't have insurance, I won't have a job, I will be looking at paying $50,000 dollars for a doctorate that I have no idea what I am going to do with? In the same way that God affirmed that the VP position at Valley was not the right direction for my life, then what if He is doing the same about this one? Well, I don't know... Maybe this was the wake up call that I needed. Maybe God has bigger better plans for me then what we can see in present time. Whatever the situation ends up being, I trust Him and the direction he has for my family and I. Nonetheless, whether it is at Olivet, or with the doctoral program or something totally different, the crossroad, the new beginning, the fresh start, the clean slate, not just a new chapter, but a new book in mine and my families life is about to be written.... and I honestly have no idea what its going to say.
Stay tuned, in two weeks the first chapter of that new book will begin to be written!
